You thought you were the last person they would find if they went looking for an emotional person. You are now confused since you met this person who tapped your feelings and now you are all emotional. Which route should you take when it turns to be an emotional love affair? Everything you do turns out to be contrary to your expectations. You are too emotional. Emotional love affairs turn out to be so hurting. It takes long to collect the pieces and move on because they rarely last. Every issue in an emotional love affair ends up in a mess. Keep your emotions in check since they are the same ones which brought you together. Love as an emotion can confuse human mind and beats all intellect. Be wise.



Emotional love affairs come crashing down since intense feelings impair the level of thinking. A previously happy affair takes a turn and becomes frustrating and saddening. Most emotional love affairs use the tit for tat phenomenon. An eye for an eye makes the whole world blind so to speak an emotional love affair. It looses direction and focuses on revenge. What do you think will happen when i feel so hurt that my partner has failed to call me. I might be dying to hear him talk i do not care about what even if it is nonsense but just his voice. I will not call him though i will be hurting. Imagine if he also gets stupidly emotional and reacts the same. The affair will simply be a game of shifting blames and on the way to the rocks. To avoid an emotional love affair, do not take revenge to more than loving your significant other back. Just love him/her.

I think i do not care if you love me so much it makes you cry all the time. The problem comes in when you hurt me by the little things you do and it makes me cry. It is not worth if i hate how much i love you. It will stop being a love affair to a war affair. An emotional love affair pushes each partner to fight with their feelings. The more you fight with yourself and reject your intense feelings the more they hit back at you. You will try and fail miserably most of the times. If you get lucky enough not to reach exhaustion, you will succeed in separating with your partner because logic dictates that such an emotional love affair is harmful to your social life. At the end of it you will have scars in your heart which you might take to the grave. To avoid this, do not encourage an emotional love affair at all costs.

An emotional love affair sabotages communication. When you are too emotional, language tends to hit the wall and expression takes a back sit. Without communication, misunderstanding is unavoidable. Please if you notice your partner is going down that route, talk about it. It is in a word. You will never guess it unless you keep talking. Be slow to anger and an emotional love affair will be news to you.



By: FRANCIS K GITHINJI

About the Author:

A question I hear so often….

I believe there are generally three types of guys:

1) passive 2) assertive 3) asshole

WE DON’T dig assholes (no pun intended..or is that really a pun?). We want REAL MEN! Individuals who are assertive, confident, strong (inner and outer), communicative, gentlemanly, exciting, unpredictable and make women feel wanted!

What we DON’T want (just as men wouldn’t either):

To be disrespected, smothered, overpowered, or mistreated.

Quality women know how to identify REAL MEN from ASSHOLES. And if she’s truly dating an asshole, then she’s probably not the person you want to date in the first place. Look, nice/passive guys don’t necessarily finish last..but assertive guys definitely finish before them. That’s because these men go for what they want.

So the real question is: How do you become more assertive?

1. Know your strengths

Spend time to reflect on what your strengths are and present those qualities.

2. Live it up!

The more passionate you are..the more traveled.. the more rounded you are, the more you’ll naturally have to talk about. You’ll come off as interesting and bound to have good conversations.

3. Follow through

If you think, feel, or plan something…make sure you complete it! No half-assed-ness!

4. Keep it light…enjoy yourself

Don’t sabotage yourself with lots of pressure. Think of it as meeting a new friend and keep it light. If it goes well, then great. If it doesn’t, no sweat off your back.

5. Say NO!

No need to always agree or give in because you think that’s what he/she wants.

6. Take charge!

How is a female supposed to know that you’re interested if you don’t flirt with her and ask her out? She might be feeling the same!

7. Be true to yourself

Why mold yourself into someone you’re not? Be genuine and make decisions based on your gut feelings.

Did you find these effective? What are some of your tips that worked well? I would love to hear them! As always, thanks for being my V’stars!

Vanae’s tip of the dae: When someone offends you, learn from it. Ever feel offended by someone’s comment or response to you? Sure, it’s natural to feel hurt…but step back and reflect. It’s not what he/she did, but what you can gain from it..whether it makes you stronger, changes you for the better, or solidifies even more so what you already stand for. Remember… you can turn anything negative into something positive!



By: Vanae

About the Author:

The internet has been a big factor in the evolution of on line dating for without it people around the world will not be given the chance to meet a potential partner in the comforts of their very own home. The internet has accommodated the fast and trendy lifestyle of today by introducing on line dating, which is perfect for those who just want a cyber partner or those too timid to go out and meet new people.

Just like normal dating, there are certain tips that you might want to take note of when on line dating. There are three basic tips that you have to keep in mind for you to make the most out of on line dating. The first of which is to set and condition your mind in what you will be doing. Little has been said about the success rate of on line dating, however, there are a lucky few who found their lifetime partner through cyberspace. You should not be so serious when you are still starting to date online. Likewise, you should not expect immediate results. The one thing that you should put as a priority when dating online is to have fun. It is but a fact that not everything found on the Internet is real so you have to prepare yourself for some disappointments ahead.

The second tip that will prove to be helpful in cyberspace dating is to look for a reliable on line dating site. Because of its popularity, sites offering the chance to meet that special someone online have grown in numbers over the years. So before joining the throngs of the many hopefuls, it would be wise to do some research beforehand. This can be done by asking other people online as to their experiences with a particular site. You can even ask your friends for feedback if they are familiar with a dating website.

Since you can never be too sure of the reliability and safety with internet dating, you must practice it with a little bit of caution. This is the final step you have to consider when pondering to go online for your dating ventures. Most on line dating sites will require you to fill up a profile for matching purposes. When doing this avoid posting any contact information including your phone numbers and physical address. It should be enough that you are contactable by your email address.

For the first timers, dating online can be scary since it is like exploring an uncharted territory. However, if you keep some of the tips mentioned above in check, then, you will definitely avoid any problems with cyberspace dating. Finding love online nowadays is no longer a myth. It can come true and you can be one of the millions who have found their true love online. Lose no hope and take that first step into dating online. Just remember to have fun while dating because putting too much pressure on yourself will likely lead to an unpleasant experience.



By: Kelly Purden

About the Author:

How to get girls to like you is probably one of the trickiest questions you ever asked yourself. For starters, most of the girls are picky. They have certain standards that in the event that you do not fall under a specific category, you are automatically stricken off the hot item list. Obviously, the connection between two people is over even before it started. It’s a sad fact that the conclusive minds of most women makes it hard for most men to connect.

Generally, it’s all a matter of personal strategy. There is no specific formula when it comes on how to get girls to like you. It always varies on the way you execute it and the way girls react on it.

There are ways to by-pass the judgmental eyes of the woman. It is by overruling their presumption even before it commences. Sounds like a simple solution right? Here are a few factors to watch on how to get girls to like you tonight.

Tip #1: Be the Man in Between

When you ask women what they want in a man, they’ll usually give you a safe answer. Some of it includes a gentle, sensible and honest man. Of course, they always qualify their answers. They don’t want too much or too less of the attitude. Give them extremes they’ll not want you at all. In short, they want the right blend of sugar, spice and everything nice.

Tip #2: Treat Her Like a Lady

It is common knowledge that women like men who treat them like royalties. You do not have to overdo it. Always be a gentleman and open the door for her, carry her heavy luggage or walk her home. But I also suggest treat her with respect in doses and break her chops a little when she acts bratty. Women will view this as a challenge. Don’t ever be that loser whom the girl walks all over like a doormat.

Tip #3: Show Her Your True Colors

Getting a girl to like you will be useless if there’s no connection established between the both of you. Speak your mind. Be brave to tell her what you think about certain issues but don’t get too carried away. Your objective is to get a girl to like you in an instant and not to get her to hate you. It’s not a debate. Talk to her in a way that she can see what kind of man you really are. Don’t make the conversation all about yourself. Take turns in talking and listening. What ever you do don’t bring up boring topics such as politics, video games and sex. They are instant turn-offs and bringing up sex only transmits what you want and her guard will be up.

Tip #4: Don’t Try Too Hard To Impress

Women will be impressed on things that really interest them. You don’t have to try too hard in doing so. Men tend to sensationalize things to make an impression on someone. Unfortunately, men don’t realize that the more that they try to impress a woman, the more she’ll think that he is insecure. Women believe that if a man is confident in himself, he doesn’t need to bring out things that will boost his ego. It’s not the first on the list of suggested moves on how to get girls to like you in an instant.

Tip #5: X-Factor

As mentioned earlier, girls have certain standards. One of the things that can make a girl disregard her standards is to have the x-factor. It’s the striking asset that women notice in a man without speaking a word. It speaks for itself. The x-factor varies from person to person. You just have to be creative in picking which asset of yours you want to improve and use.

The item mentioned above are just few of the factors that might be useful on how to get girls to like you instantly. The list can go on and on but only you’re the only one who can choose which one best applies to you.



By: Andres Munoz

About the Author:

It’s no surprise that some children raised from families with good morals end up messing their lives up. Have you ever wondered why a Pastor’s child may become a drug addict, a criminal or whatever is off side the pastoral function? Simple, the answer is that children are the same all over. I conclude so from a national radio discussion where parents and children were free to call and voice their opinions on the subject ‘Assuring Young Starts of a Future Despite Failure’

Its is amazing that most parents know that the most powerful influencing factor for a child’s success is love. Parents that do not love their children are more likely to be the cause of any undesired behavior from their children. During this lunch time discussion over the national radio stations, one girl (18) called to tell the nation that she quit school because of an abusive step mother. This was the only child who called. I suppose she used her spared cash to let the nation know that some parents are killing their children. So when an abusive parent thinks to himself that it is nice to have a child because I can instruct them around, they’re actually saying ‘It’s nice to kill my child’.

Parents called and about 95 percent of them emphasized on the call for parents to love their children. One parent complained on children having rights to report abusive parents to the law. It is common for some parents, particularly in the rurals, to mistake abuse for corporate punishment. Some mistake ‘rights’ for ‘dominance’. They think if children cry for their rights, they want to dominate in the family, which has resulted in many parents objecting to the children’s rights agenda. 

A detailed/raw capture of the discussions can be sourced from this link.



By: Musawenkosi

About the Author:

Looking for a small intimate elegant hotel in the Bahamas, slightly off the beaten track then check out Dunmore Beach Club on Harbour Island

A Bahamas Vacation at Dunmore Beach Club on Harbour Island might suit you very well, particularly if you need to escape from the pressures of life, and you don’t want too much activity based stuff, but rather a leisurely time. If you don’t already know Harbour Island known as Briland to its residents is situated just off the northeast coast of Eleuthers. It is only three miles long and half a mile wide, and is surrounded by coral reef. To get to Dunmore Beach Club you can fly into North Eleuthera Airport, then a short taxi ride to the dock a 15 minute boat taxi to Harbour Island, then a 5 minute taxi ride to the hotel.

The Dunmore Beach Club was originally built for the Duke and Duchess of Windsor and their friends and accommodates up to thirty two guests in sixteen very private cottage accommodations. The whole site covers eight acres, and all the patios have just the most stunning ocean views. There are 10 updated and enlarged guest accommodations, each with six foot Jacuzzi tubs, and huge showers. All meals are included in your Bahamas Vacation at Dunmore Beach Club, served on the romantic outdoor terrace, or in the dining room. The dinner is of gourmet quality, and gentlemen are asked to wear jackets and collared shirts in the winter season. The bar operates on an honour system, so you make your own drinks, and write down what you have had.

Dunmore Beach Club is really a very elegant and lovely Bahamas hotel, with a very high rate of satisfaction, being well over 80%. There are lots of little touches which help to make a Bahamas Vacation here very special, such as iced tea and sun screen by the beach, homemade cookies, to name but two.

You will not find a more stunning beach anywhere, the beautiful pink sand, the blue sky, and the turquoise sea, mean you can just lie in a hammock and gaze open mouthed.at it for hours. This must be the place for beauty, serenity, and tranquillity on Harbour Island, and it does attract a certain type of clientele. These are people who like relaxed elegance, who enjoy dressing up for dinner, who like top class but unobtrusive service, and aren’t bothered at all if there isn’t television, or a telephone in the room, or 24 hour room service. In fact they are delighted just to escape this kind of thing. The words elegance and charm occur again and again when guests describe the Dunmore Beach Club. This description particularly the word charm is also frequently used to describe the staff, many of whom have been in service here for a long time. They do give a lasting impression of really loving what they do, and their air of happiness seems to be shared by all the islanders who have happy smiles and are so friendly.

To summarise Dunmore Beach Club is a high class old fashioned Bahamas Hotel sitting on a picture perfect beach, and if you like high standards and elegance then this could be a great choice for your Bahamas Vacation.



By: Jason Law

About the Author:

Putting your personality into your house is the best way to make it a home. Whether you’re using your own muse or someone else’s put yourself into everything you create at home for a relaxing life experience.

One of the first things I realized about home decorating-after my three thousand or so attempts at making my place look like all the pictures from the magazines-is that home decorating should reflect your personal style. Your home should reflect who you are and what you love.

Of course, I’m not saying that this revelation made me prance around my house with two cans of pink and yellow paint or that I plastered bunnies and butterflies everywhere-and yes, I do actually love pink, yellow, bunnies and butterflies-but I did put a little bit of myself into every room.

I got a certain sense of personal satisfaction from painting my ugly orange countertops a vibrant country red that matched my lust for life and the décor I actually wanted to toss around my kitchen. And my own personal works of art-paintings, photographs, sculptures-are set up around my place as well, giving it just that look of being lived in by somebody who loves and experiences life.

Of course, I recognize that we can’t all spend our evenings splashing around in water colors, or spend our weekends chasing a gaggle of baby quails about the yard trying to take their pictures.

That’s why there are professional designers out there who dedicate their lives to creating home décor that other people can use to express themselves and their individuality. And it’s okay to buy your curtains and blankets if you don’t know how to sew-crafty as I am, I still bought all my curtains and most of my blankets.

Of the things I love most in my home, my furniture doesn’t even come close to counting. It’s the accessories in my home that make it look like I personally live there and that no one else can shake my individuality.

One of my favorite items is a cotton area rug I recently purchased on a trip to the Deep South. This area rug was handmade in mills in the Deep South, where the cotton was picked fresh, milled in a southern mill, cleaned, spun and woven all by the same family of rug makers. When the bed is too hot at night, I frequently sleep on this rug and it makes me feel like I’m back in the Deep South all over again.

I realize that area rugs are not for everyone, but it can be an excellent place to start in learning to develop a personality for your home that meshes with your own personality rather than clashing and making you feel uncomfortable in your own home.

Different types of accessories are truly the way to bring out your personality in your home. Whether it is an area rug, artwork, photographs, drapery, throw pillows or knick knacks that represent different moments in your life, you can always find a way to make yourself feel at home if you just put a little bit of yourself into your own home.



By: Sarah Crosset

About the Author:

Are you a Saint? A Zen Master? How about just a good human being? How do you know? What are the qualification? Are there any tests you can take to find out your spiritual growth? Yes there are.

There are lots of ways to test your spiritual progress and life is constantly doing just that by giving you tests to help you evaluate yourself in order to make spiritual progress. There are also many ways to assess your spiritual level proactively and in this article I will provide one such illuminating test.

Human beings are complex and so is life. I am glad it is so. The test I propose in this document is to evaluate some aspects of your being and is by no means a comprehensive examination. Perhaps I will come up with a more complete system down the road, but for now let’s try this one test to get us started.

This test will help you determine if you have the right perspective, the right spiritual attitude towards life, or if you have been snared by society and entrapped by the ugly web of attachment.

From my experience this one test, although simple, is quite revealing. It is incisive and cuts deep into your psyche to reveal the conditions under which you are currently operating. Using it, I can not only keep a sharp eye on if I am slipping into the jaws of ambition, but can also determine the state others are in, with regard to their “spiritual evolution”.

By no means am I suggesting that you start to use this test (or others I might propose) to start judging the world or yourself harshly. The test is simply to be used as an indicator, to give you insight and help you with your spiritual work. So here is how the test works.

Test To Determine Your Spiritual Growth & Mental State

Step 1: Take a few moments and determine what you are very passionate about. This can be your career, but, does not necessarily have to be so. It should be something, though, that you are actively engaged in doing and something that you feel deeply about. Here are some examples: Yoga Teacher, Professional Blogger, Health Care Professional, Technology Professional, Businessman, Politician, etc.

Step 2: In this field that you care very deeply about, think about someone who is enormously successful. Successful in all ways if possible. Someone who has made a huge amount of money in that field, become famous and is powerful. Now one more criteria is important about this person. If possible, have it be someone who you don’t like, or don’t agree with. The more you dislike their ways and methods the better, but the test will also work pretty well even if you don’t dislike the person or their systems.

Step 3: Watch your reaction to when you hear complimentary information about this person, or just hear about the success this person is having in their life. Be brutally honest, or you will just be cheating yourself. Does it create any negative wave within you? Any tinge of jealousy? Any feeling of irritation? Any feeling of frustration? Any feeling of hurt? Does it cause any ripple, any disturbance, in your psyche? The greater the disturbance the more the test indicates its time to get busy with your spiritual practice. Here is a more detailed analysis of the test results.

A negative reaction or disturbance can indicate the following with regard to your spiritual state.

1. Too Much Ambition: You are probably focused too much on getting results and are overly ambitious. These attachments to the results can cause jealousy and ill-will towards those who have already achieved what you so badly seek. Another way to look at this is you may not be doing what your really love to do in life? This is the only way to be free of the clutches of society and gain oriented living. Doing what you love to do, will free you from everything. If this test produced negative waves, it could mean that you are only doing things to see what you will get out of them, instead of doing things for their own sake.

2. Non-Dual Perception of Reality: The test could also indicate that you are living excessively in an ego-centric way. You are seeing the world as full of separate people and focusing on the various personalities, instead of seeing the world in a non-dual light with all of creation being One and having nothing but divine nature. As Yogi Bhajan points out, “If you don’t see God in all, you don’t see God at all.” Are you seeing the Divine Nature of he who is getting under your skin? Are you seeing the Oneness of Reality?

3. Chasing the Wrong Things in Life: If you have never thought about it, let me point out an interesting fact about enlightenment. In society there is so much competition because resources/rewards are limited. There are only so many top 10 Blogs, there is only 1 winner in the tournaments, there are only limited political seats, there is only 1 CEO, only so much oil, land, etc etc. This breeds competition and conflict. But Enlightenment is not limited. Just because I am enlightened, does not mean you can’t be also. We can all be enlightened (and are), so this is one of those things you can chase without worrying about having to wrestle it away from anyone else. There is no need to compete, it is an infinite, inexhaustible resource.

So this test implies that you are not exclusively chasing enlightenment. You are getting distracted and running around all over the place chasing useless stupid things. Time to buckle down and get back to the business of going after that which is the highest purpose of man. Time to fulfill your destiny.

Take this test from time to time, or be aware when life brings it your way. It is an insightful instrument to gauge your goodness and spiritual understanding.



By: Anmol Mehta

About the Author:

In their more than 50 years together as husband and wife, Patricia’s husband cheater on her frequently but Patricia always forgave him. She admits that she turned a blind eye all these years just to save the relationship, and mostly because of her husband’s generosity.

But the time finally came when she really has to end the relationship once and for all. It became impossible for them to talk without getting into an argument. Therefore, two years ago, after catching her husband red-handed with one of their house cleaners, she put her foot down. Now she knew better, she really had to let go of the relationship.

It is in this kind of situation that one might ponder on the thought of holding on just to save the relationship. In most cases of problem on relationships, an individual would dare to think if he or she should let go or will it be better to stay and try to change things for the better.

At first, it becomes a matter of choice. It is a tough decision you have to make. But the choice to let go and leave the other person is such a heartbreaking experience that your heart seem to cry with such excruciating pain that no one would dare go for on an instant.

What is even worse is for the mothers or the fathers out there who would try to contemplate on hanging on for the sake of the children.

In reality, this part is greatly attributed for the mothers because according to the statistical reports of the census, nearly 85% of all the children that show signs of “behavioral disorders” come from “fatherless homes.” This goes to show that it is the father that is most likely to leave the home compared to the mother.

The Agony of Love

For any relationship between a man and a woman, it would be better if they will both make things work out. We cannot dismiss the fact that problems really do thrive in a relationship. In fact, it is the basic ingredient that would make the relationship stronger. 85% of successfully married couples for almost 20 years insisted that their quarrels have been the threshold to a long-lasting relationship.

The only problem with other couples is that they do not know how to deal with the problems easily. What is even worse is that the other person or both of them give up easily.

Some clinical psychologists that are expert on marital affairs asserted that there are three things that a couple should learn to make use of so that they will know whether or not the bond that unites them as one could still be revived.

Here are the three things that the couple should use in their evaluation:

1. Learn how to transform your mate so as to live a mutually harmonious life.

2. Learn to accept the feeling that even if you feel that there is any more between you and your partner, you really just cannot find it easy to leave and so it is better to find a way to save the relationship.

3. Learn to accept the truth if it was you who was you who was so irrational and that you should learn how to find ways to change it.

4. Without any other reason and priorities, learn to make things work out just for the children’s sake.

5. To accept the fact that even if there is nothing wrong with your mate, you just could not accept the fact that you are not contented and happy with him anymore.

These are just a few of the many things that the experts would want couples to deliberate so that they could find the answers themselves whether or not it is appropriate for them to leave or to stay.

The problem with some people, especially women, is that they ten to hold on to the fact that their husbands might change. That in spite of the abuses and the pain that they continuously experience, they still believe that there will be changes, even if they do not know exactly when that will be. For this, almost 50% of the reported abused women chose to stay with their husbands.

Given that premise, the question of “Should I stay or should I go?” is not merely a choice. It is a life, where your future will absolutely depend on your answers.

Indeed, nobody knows the answer better than you do. So take time to think things over and ponder hard on the consequences of your actions.



By: My Relationship Tips

About the Author:

Halloween is loved by children of all ages, both young and old. One of the most exciting decisions about Halloween is choosing just the right costume to express your holiday glee. Whether you choose to go as something that may slink out of a horror story or something as ethereal as skipping out of a fairytale, you are sure to find just what you need, as long as you give yourself enough time to choose what you want and make sure everything fits right before All Hallows Eve. Once you have your costume picked out, you should then go about choosing just the right Halloween accessories to emphasis your costume.

There is a vast array of Halloween accessories from which to choose, and the all depend upon the costume you will wear as well as the special effects you wish to obtain by adding accessories. For instance, there are many wigs to choose from such as afro wigs, beehive, Goth and evil sorceress, princess, chorus line and Bridezilla style Halloween wigs as well as many more, and they usually come in a great many different colors to chose from. However, you should not stop with just a Halloween wig for an accessory. You will also find wide selection of Halloween makeup and artificial tattoos as well as eye contacts that will add that something extra to your exciting Halloween ensemble.

For instance, perhaps this year you would like to go as a fairy or some other creature that would be adorned with magnificent wings, such as a butterfly, dragonfly or bumblebee. Then again, you have a wonderful choice of wings when showing up for the Halloween party dresses as one of the children of the night, as vampires, demons and devils can also use the accessory of wings when celebrating Halloween.

We cannot forget angels and fairies in the Halloween festivities. Many wings are made of lace, gauze, netting or even feathers, which come in a rainbow of colors to match any Halloween costume. These wings are usually complimented with the use of glitter and iridescent paints.

Remember to order any type of headgear that might accessorize your costume, as you will be able to find angel halos and devil horns as well. On the other hand, perhaps you fancy impersonating a dashing pirate and other such masquerading mascots.

While you at it, remember to pick out any other Halloween accessory props, so you are as authentic looking as possible while attending your costume parties or trick or treating door to door. While considering your Halloween costume, you can choose from crowns of royalty to the courts jester as well as a Viking, witch, Indian Chief or bride. Then again, you may be interested in a fairy wand, the staff of a wizard, the sword of a pirate or other type of fake weaponry to accentuate you Halloween costume.

Do not forget such Halloween accessories such as shoes, stockings and petticoats to compliment the Halloween fashions we wear, as they are also a great basic aid in pulling off a perfect Halloween masquerade.



By: Susan G West

About the Author: